When I was 17, I almost drowned. I was swimming with my family at a California beach and got caught in a current. At first, I panicked, fighting to get my head above water, thrashing “ass over elbow” as my father would say.
Then somehow a sense of calm came over me, and I began rolling in the water. I felt like one of those yin-yang images of dolphins with their backs curved, flowing in a circle. Like a mantra, my internal voice was saying: “I’m drowning, I’m drowning, I’m drowning.” No worry, no struggle, just peace. Moments later, my dad yanked me out of the water by my arm.
Today we would call this an NDE, a near death experience, but back then, it wasn’t such a big deal. Dad asked if I was okay, I sort of sputtered out a yes, and that was that. Although I was grateful I didn’t drown, I didn’t ponder any greater meaning of the event at the time.
Now I can see that I was experiencing flow state. That suspended moment where there is no sense of space or time. Where one completely surrenders to what is without effort and follows the current of the Universe.
I’ve been exploring this idea as we enter Pisces season, inspired by the fluid, intuitive astrological sign of the fish. Can I create a life that’s like that day in the ocean when I allowed myself to succumb to the moment? Is it possible to surrender to the flow and still exercise my free will? Can I care about what is going on the world, do my part to contribute solutions, and stay in the vibration of trust that all is as it should be? The answer to all three is yes, but it’s certainly not easy.
There have been plenty of flow moments in my life, albeit far less dramatic than nearly drowning. When I’m riding my horse, for example, or writing a poem or dancing. I can easily get to and stay in flow state when I am facilitating a reading or a healing for a client but find it much harder in my daily life. The reason? The illusion of control.
The desperate need we humans have to attempt to control life yanks us out of the ocean of flow where we can co-create with the Universe. We often struggle to manifest what we long for because we put too many parameters on what our fulfilled desires will look like. What works better for me is expressing my wishes to the Universe without a full picture of my expected outcome. Then I follow signs and synchronicities to flow toward what is waiting for me, rather than doing the much harder work of trying to call something in.
I head toward places where energy feels active and try to let go of obligations, tasks, ideas and even relationships that feel complete or devoid of life force. This takes some practice, and of course perfection is impossible. Letting go is difficult, even when it’s obvious I’m blocking my path by clinging.
One of the tools I use for sensing energy is to notice how my body feels when I am trying to control something (or someone) as opposed to how it feels when I release and trust. My breath too. I tune in to these to signals to alert me when I’m thrashing rather than rolling.
Water itself is a flow teacher. It models for us how to persevere by taking the path of least resistance. Like when I was trapped under the ocean. The moment I stopped flailing and started allowing my body to move with the flow of water, time suspended, and I became calm. Perhaps I could have died, but fighting wasn’t useful. All I could do was trust.
How do you stay in the flow? Please share! If you are searching, connect with your soul wisdom through my healing approach to intuitive readings and spiritual mentoring. Find out more and book your session today.