When I was 17, I almost drowned. I was swimming with my family at a California beach and got caught in a current. At first I panicked, fighting to get my head above water, thrashing “ass over elbow” as my father would say.
Then somehow a sense of calm came over me, and I began rolling in the water. I felt like those yin-yang images of dolphins with their backs curved into an upside down “u” shape, flowing in a circle. Like a mantra, I was saying to myself: “I’m drowning, I’m drowning, I’m drowning.” No worry, no struggle, just peace. Moments later, my dad yanked me out of the water, and although I’m grateful I didn’t drown, I will always miss that sense of complete serenity.
What if life could be like that brief moment in the ocean when I allowed myself to succumb the flow? Is it possible to surrender to the flow and still be an intelligent, action-oriented person? Can I care about what is going on the world, do my part to contribute solutions, and stay in a vibration of trust that all is as it should be?
I’ve been exploring these ideas in this month of Pisces, the flowy, intuitive sign of the fish. And one of the things I’m noticing is how my body feels when I am trying too hard to control someone or something and how it feels when I let go and trust the flow. My breath too. I’m tuning in to these to signals to let me know when I’m thrashing rather than rolling. Want to join me?